Anonymous asked: I liked my ex for 5 years. We had an on and off relationship and then dated for a couple of months but he decided he wanted to leave me behind when college started. Eventually, I moved on and now I've been with my current boyfriend for almost a year and I love him very much. He gives me a sense of peace I never had with my ex. My ex has also been with someone for a few months, and he seems happy. I've been keeping in touch with him because we still care about each other, in a way that no breakup could change. But sometimes, I get lost in our conversations and it feels like old times. That made me uneasy because I didn't want to risk getting feelings for him again. One day, his girlfriend got injured badly and he was telling me how helpless he felt and that he cried. Idk why but I got angry. I mean, he may not care but I'm still his ex. I’m not gonna be an idiot and comfort him while he cries over a girl. So I told him that we couldn't be friends anymore. I wanted to believe that we could get close without getting too close so I could still have him in my life but I guess I still haven't healed. When I told him this, we ended up having a very honest conversation. He told me that sometimes he knows that his gf isnt right for him and that I was "the one that got away" and that there are times he missed me as more than a friend. We both knew that if we talked to each other and spent time enough time together, all these buried feelings would shoot up to the surface. That’s why we’re not talking anymore. But I don’t know what to do. I'm in love with my boyfriend but my ex is my first love. That person you cant help but have feelings for.

Not talking and keeping your distance from your ex is the best way of moving on and being happy with your boyfriend. You will always have feelings for your first love. You must tell him that so that you can be content with your relationship with your boyfriend. Because your ex cannot still come to you with problems. He needs to find others that will fill that gap now. 

Hope this has helped and good luck.

-Marta